How do you deal with someone you love if you think they are suffering with depression?
Depression is a dark, lonely and scary time in that persons life. The most important word there is “Lonely”. Imagine for just a second you’re sat in a room on your own, thinking about how vile you think you are, how nobody really cares about you, and contemplating harming yourself or suicide, and if we choose to not saying anything just incase we upset that person then we will reinforce the fact that they are lonely. I understand it may be awkward, I understand they may not want to listen but by starting the ball rolling is the Begining of a possibility of change and a guide towards the light at the end of the tunnel.
There are many reasons we can get depressed and sometimes there are no reasons at all, it can just happen. So don’t blame yourself if you’ve got it, don’t blame others for getting it, and don’t see it as a sign of weakness either because it isn’t any of these. It is a genuine recognised illness along with cancer, heart conditions and so on. The bloody ball ache about mental illness is its the unknown. How long will I have it for? Can you be “fixed”? And how do I explain it? The answer to these are all different im afraid we are all different so healing times and experiences are different. At first I fought against mine, I was angry. And I told myself that I’d be better soon and it will go away. I did “get better” but because I didn’t understand it, it came back. And it kept coming back. So my advice to you, your friends or neighbours would be, begin to except. Except the fact depression maybe a part of your life, just like a cough and cold. You are not depression. You are not Mental Health. You are a whole person and that “Whole self” is a collection of things. Depression is just one of them.
So what do you do? Aknowledge it’s there. Admit that you are struggling and are ready to feel brighter. Let that someone know that you are there to support them and not judge. It’s because you respect that person you have chosen to speak up. Depression can’t be beaten by sitting in all the time or lying in bed and never moving. So try and get that person or yourself to go for a walk with you regularly but make sure it’s a safe environment and not jam packed full of people. This is a good start, moving the body and mind.
How is their diet? Believe it or not but if you constantly eat crap you feel crap. We all know are bodies better than anyone so you may need 3 good meals a day, little and often but whatever it is eat well.
Sleep. How’s the sleep? Broken, can’t get off at all or waking in the middle of the night. These are all signs of depression. And shutting themselves away. When was the last time you saw this person? Heard from them? Or see them smile and give you eye contact instead of putting their heads down? Really try and think. Because if you are concerned about someone, save them, help them because one day it might just be you.
- So go outside
- Feel the sun, wind or rain on your face
- Plant something colourful in the garden and watch it grow
- Laugh with friends
- Eat right and feel right
- Take your pills
- Look at today not tomorrow
- Set goals
- Friends are for good times but also for hard times. Share.
- Learn to say No
- Learn to say Yes!
- Eat Cake
- Be honest
- Take life a step and day at a time
You can have your cake and eat it! You are in control of you.
Be who you want to be and choose Happy